Get Off My Lawn

I can't tell if he's laughing or crying.

Archive for June 2015

Deathbed Regret

The amount of time I spend looking on my phone for just the right icon to accompany a text message is something I’m sure to regret on my deathbed, yet I am powerless to stop. In fact, it is possible that in the final moments of my life, in a weakened state, my body racked with some virus of the future that originated in China (because China has pig farms on bird migration […]

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Things That Made Me Happy and Sad These Past Two Weeks

Things that have made me sad: An Edmonton police officer was shot and killed while serving a warrant. The nut job who shot him was one of Freemen on the Land, a quasi militia group that is dedicated to hate and does not recognize the authority of the government. This was the first Edmonton police officer killed in the line of duty in 25 years. Things that have made me happy: I saw Mad Max: Fury […]

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Prisoner Transport: Conclusion

Prisoner Transport Part 1 and Part 2. Our bus driver’s name was Mrs. Dodoo. Her son Stephen rode the bus as well and was in the same grade as me. Not only did poor Stephen have an unfortunate last name, he was, even by our backwoods standards, an odd-looking fellow. He had huge, brown, wide-set eyes and a nose and chin that looked like they had been malleable at one time and […]

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